notjussayin exists to share reminders with you in, both, physical and digital spaces,
encouraging you to live consciously, so you can create and live a life that works for you!
this line has been mentioned all over the place. but what does it mean? to avoid any misinterpretations/misunderstandings, i thought i’d write about it and give you some clarity.
let me first start by addressing what it’s not.
what it does NOT mean
a life that works for you does not mean that you will experience happiness ALL THE TIME or that life will always be easy. no!
sorry to burst your bubble if you thought that’s what it meant.
honestly, until recently i wanted that life too — where i could feel happy all the time. but i have come to realize one thing, it is just not possible (i have explained “why not” below). to have that kind of expectation is setting yourself up for frustration.
think about it for a minute, life is polar in nature. we have two sides to everything — happy/sad, good/bad, up/down, left/right, positive/negative, pleasure/pain, light/dark, life/death, and so on.
one cannot exist without the other. one exists BECAUSE of the other. they are different sides of the same coin. we know happiness because we have been sad. if we were to be happy ALL THE TIME, it wouldn’t be happiness, it would just be… normal!
“only know you’ve been high when you’re feeling low.”
passenger
we can distinguish happy from sad, light from dark because of our experience of both. our experience of them has us draw comparisons and these comparisons enable us to distinguish the happy times from sad times and light from dark.
the polarity exists in comparison. if we don’t compare, things just are.
what living a life that works for you means
living a life that works for you means being aware of the possible outcomes of your actions and then making informed choices.
each action has a reaction, and that reaction either works for you or not. either you’re okay with that possible outcome or you are not.
there are pros and cons for each action/situation. there is always a trade-off or an opportunity cost.
Trade-off = a situation in which you accept something bad in order to have something good. For example, For some car buyers, lack of space is an acceptable trade-off for a sporty design. Opportunity cost = what you must forgo in order to get something. For example, A player attends baseball training to be a better player instead of taking a vacation. The opportunity cost was the vacation.
to live a life that works for you means you are aware of the pros and cons, the trade-offs and the opportunity costs and you choose to live that life.
The cost of opportunities is always good to know.
G-Eazy
But if you know that then you’re good to go.
given that life is polar in nature, you will experience sad times, hard times, losses for you to be able to experience happy times, ease, victory etc.. people will come and go, you will have your heart broken, you will fail, you will lose money — it is all part of life.
BUT, when you’re living a life that works for you, you know that no matter what happens:
1. how you look at the situation and what you do about it is up to you. (Read thinking right in the wrong times)
2. who you get your heart broken from, where you lose your money, what and where you fail is up to you.
The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.
Bob Marley
choose the struggles, sadness, heartbreaks, losses that work for you!
it is your choice whom you engage in business/relationship with.
it is your choice where you invest your time and money.
to live the life that works for you means you have considered the possible outcomes, you have weighed the positives and negatives for you, and you make a conscious living choice.
one common trade-off example
…is deciding between following your passion or getting a stable job.
now, again, both situations have their pros and cons.
if you choose to follow your passion, you might struggle financially, but you will be satisfied in your soul with the fact that you are doing what you love.
on the other hand, if you take a job, you might be financially stable but you might also have a yearning to do something you love.
these decisions depend solely on the person who is making them and their appetite, or what works for them.
it is up to you to draw up the pros and cons and choose which possible outcomes you are okay to live with.
closing thoughts
the truth is, either way, you will have problems for as long as you are alive. the sooner you stop running away from this fact, the sooner you accept it, the better. that being said, you have a choice in which problems you want to deal with.
The problem is not that there are problems.
Theodore Isaac Rubin
The problem is expecting otherwise and thinking that having problems is a problem.
so in a broader sense, at the end of the day, when you live the life that works for you — you will be living a happier, more satisfying life, no matter what happens, because you chose it.
when you make choices for yourself and your life, the outcomes do not matter as much as the fact that you chose this life for yourself. you’re satisfied with the fact that at least you did what you thought was right at that time. if things don’t work out, you learn from it and move on.
you know you made a conscious choice. you didn’t do it because you had to, you did it because you wanted to, because you chose it.
your life, your choice.
a life that works for you!
a life with no regrets.
The freedom to make my own mistakes was all I ever wanted.
Mance Rayder
peace and power to you x
